Dr. Travis Parry (00:01.026)
Hey there and welcome to another episode of the Travis Parry show. Hey, today I'm going to be talking to you at a very deep level psychologically, and I can't wait to dive in. All right. So if you've been following me long enough to know a little bit about my journey and what I teach about, I help business owners who are stressed workaholics overworked, stressed because of their relationships who are, know, just trying to grow and scale their business.

But this underlying stress piece keeps coming up over and over again today on this episode, I am excited to dive deeper with you and to help you into four different levels of psychology that you've never heard about in your psychology classes. Even those of you who are in master's programs, even doctoral programs will not know about probably level three or level four, which we're going to dive into deep today. I am so excited. Here we go.

All right. So one of the biggest reasons why I discovered this fascination was for psychology was because when my father passed away, I realized after the autopsy and everything that there was a stress induced heart attack. And as I explored stress, I read every book, I went to seminars, I dove deep into various coaching and

I really developed this knack for understanding problems, identifying them, figuring out a pattern that would work for me, trying it out, and then teaching others. This led me to coach and speak and become a thought leader and eventually receive my doctorate, and be able to, help, research and coach and speak on stages all across the country. Now.

The reason why I even mentioned this is because my initial, career choice was as a financial advisor to help people to achieve their goals. And I was all about it. I really wanted that direction. and you know, some people might say, well, you took the sidetrack. kind of went and did this stuff in psychology. Well, that is because most my clients and most business owners who I met with

Dr. Travis Parry (02:26.926)
We're so stressed about various things. They never actually executed on their plans. We could come up with elaborate plans. They just wouldn't execute it. So, you know, you've listened to prior podcasts where I've interviewed specialists and I've interviewed, you know, other incredibly smart people, to, help you grow and scale without becoming stressed out. you'll notice that I've talked about various ways that I can help people, whether that's, you know, with their legacy, with their.

with their marriage, with their own balance. All of these things are really important. The problem is, after I created a system for all of these and wrote books on all of these subjects, I realized that the majority of people will actually not implement, even with help, until they get into a very deep level of psychological clarity.

And that's what I want to discuss with you today. How do we get there? What is it that we do? I'm going to talk pretty high level here, and then we're going to drill in to these areas. So there's really four levels and these four levels have come to me by again, testing, research, trial and error, case studies, and then being able to see how this works in real life with clients and friends and others. So these four levels.

level one. and by the way, I'm to back up just quick before I jumped into these four levels. I just saw a quote today, by Tony Robbins, who, you know, most, whether you like him or not, most see him as the most successful life coach in the world, right? At least in the country, but if not the world, is the most famous at least. And while he may not offer, you know, his services to everyone, he has,

really nailed a niche and he's, he's a great business owner. There's a lot of, um, debate on how he does things and et cetera. Uh, but obviously he's B he's become very successful and we know that I'm not suggesting that you need to go and get Tony's help. Maybe that that is helpful. Maybe you have gone to his events, et cetera. Um, I haven't personally gone to his events. I've read some of his books, um, watch, uh, uh, some of the

Dr. Travis Parry (04:53.23)
things he's spoken on his Ted talk, et cetera. And I've really explored a lot of his concepts, but I'm actually going to help you understand where he got some of those concepts today. Uh, later on when we get into level three, but he mentioned something today that was fantastic. Um, he said, listen, I've worked with a lot of business owners and he has, is legit. The majority of, of people though, that work with the Tony Robbins, uh, you know,

Uh, company that they're not working with Tony, right? Uh, his, his coaches, certified coaches are helping the majority of people, but he works with the very high level, um, individuals out there who want to, you know, take their business and their life to the next level, which is awesome. I love what he's doing and what he stands for now, how he does it. That's a different story. But what he said is this 80%, 80 % of those who he's worked with.

Like they just needed some psychological, clearing some clarity, getting past their psychological limiting beliefs, these sub conscious issues that keep them stuck. And you know, 20%, let me back up the majority of his clients, 80 % of getting to that next level was psychological 20%.

was their systems marketing, you know, HR, sales, et cetera, which I talk about in my book, Marion Grorich. Okay. These, these very serious, but he's like, listen, you can get all the skills that you want, but you're never going to execute on it until you clear up your psychology. And this is exactly what I want to explain. So then how do you do that? How does one, like we've heard about limiting blocks. We've heard about.

belief system, subconscious programming. Tony's very big into NLP, which I will break down a little bit today and explain where this comes from. And, and, and, you know, you can reprogram the subconscious mind to help you actually achieve what you want to achieve subconsciously. Well, all that's good, but you need to start, I believe in level one. This brings me back to my main point here, level one, level two, level three, level four in level one.

Dr. Travis Parry (07:18.702)
One really needs to know consciously where you stand. What are your values? What do you stand for consciously? Okay. In the model of the mind, there's really a conscious, a subconscious and a super conscious. And we're to break these down, but level one is very much in his conscious mind. In your conscious mind, you're using the frontal lobes as an adult. Those are fully developed after

25, 26, depending on the research and if you're male or female, okay? Females, they develop earlier and those frontal lobes are activated. That's why they tend to be more mature. They tend to act older. They tend to have better cognitive function, okay? Earlier in life. Where males, it takes us 25, 26, okay, on average. So I'm speaking to men here. 25, you're able to think pretty consciously, to analyze things and take...

action on what it is that you think you should. All right. But the crazy thing is, is you're only in that frontal lobe, that conscious mind, if you will, for about 5 % of the day. 5%.

Which means if you're trying to solve problems in your life, you're trying to make things work. You're trying to get to the next level in your business. You're trying to grow your wealth, whatever it is. It's likely not happening because you're spending your time in the cognitive areas. Okay. It's likely because your subconscious, which you spend about 94 % of your day in is pretty healthy and it's working really well. Okay. So

In level one, you need to get really clear about your values. In my first book, achieving balance, I really nailed this. Like what are your values? Where did they come from? How do you examine these? Where, where, where can you, you know, pull from to figure out what your values are? Now I'm very clear on this because after my father died, I wrote my own obituary, so to speak, but I did it in a different way. It was a mini obituary. I looked at what I wanted to become.

Dr. Travis Parry (09:34.67)
Not necessarily how I died and all these things, it's like, Hey, what are my values? know others have done this. Covey is a big fan of this and asked a lot of people to do that in his trainings. But I focus on a different methodology. I focus on what are the very specific values and those become your affirmations. John Hasroth, Joe Vitale, Jim Rohn.

And others have really focused on, like what are your affirmations? What is it that you tell yourself every day to help you become a better person? Well, I, I really want to focus on not just stealing others. Affirmations and saying, he, I like what this person is not, but no focus on what God wants you to become in all areas of life. I've had identified 10 areas in, in, my trainings. That's what I use. So identify those values.

that are what I call principles that guide your life. What are those principles? Typically they're characteristics of you. I've talked about this on the show a lot, okay? But this is the focus of level one. You really need to identify who you are, who you want to become. And the reason being is because the conscious mind, at least the conscious part of the mind, if you're setting intentions to do these things, for example,

Let's go career wise. I want to 10 X my business. Okay. But in the subconscious mind, you have a fear or you have a limiting belief or block that's telling you that you're not worth it or you can't do it or you'll never do it or people think that you're dumb or, or whatever. Those, you know, subconscious limiting beliefs are actually going to be in, conflict.

with the conscious mind, therefore creating stress. This is actually one of the major reasons why I study psychology. I really want to understand what stress is, where does it come from? There's different kinds of stress. There's bad stress and good stress. I'm just going to focus here, generally speaking, that you will feel this distress, this bad stress. And in so doing, until you align your values with your subconscious beliefs, it will not.

Dr. Travis Parry (11:58.498)
work, you will have stress and you will not be fulfilled. And this is the whole concept of feeling, you know, balanced. Now what I would typically insert here is goals and you know, acting with your time to align what it is you're doing your actions. But here's the problem at level one. This is very behavioral, psychological. Okay. Now behavior is, is easier.

Then cognitive functions like your mental thoughts and belief system. The behavior is easier to track. It's easier to measure. It's easier to research. So most psychologists are behavioral psychologists. They care about how you behave. Child psychologists, they look at the behavior of a kid and deduce certain things, right? Maybe he was taught this to do this or to do that or not taught.

Right? And this is how he relates to his mom or dad. If it's attachment theory, et cetera, et cetera, et cetera. They focus on how the child behaves. Well, honestly, I think I made the mistake with my book, Achieving Balance, of focusing too much on behavior. Set goals, run your goals through a priority matrix, and then put the time in to make this happen.

The make time method absolutely works for people that use it. Having an ideal calendar absolutely is killer. And it's the most productive way I've seen to be able to shrink the time that you work and be able to focus more on the priorities that are most important to you. I will die on that Hill. But the reason why I say I made a mistake in focusing on it too much. was actually talking to a friend about this today is because it's so behavioral and behavior.

psychological methods, you know, if you talk to those who are focused on changing your thought processes, the cognitive psychologists, there's always a fight between the behavioralists and the cognitive. Well, when you use both the behavioral and the cognitive, you're much more likely to actually succeed. I gave a wink and a nod to the psychological, subconscious beliefs, but it was the last chapter in this book, achieving balance. And I think it was the most overlooked chapter.

Dr. Travis Parry (14:23.426)
I really wish I would have put that first and talked about it first. And this is why I'm running some penance right now, because I'm trying to give this understanding to you that most people, if they know their values and their beliefs and if they know where they need to be going, well, that's kind of a level one interaction psychologically. They're consciously focused. Well, most of us,

don't even have our values, let alone goals or time management system or anything else of that nature. And so what typically happens is we aren't going to be successful in a time management system. We're not going to be successful achieving our goals because that's behavior. And until we fix the psychology, it's not really going to work. So level one, you need to at least know where you're going. Level two.

This is where we dive into the subconscious, but there's two parts to this. There is kind of the top level subconscious beliefs. And I want us to first understand that the brain and the mind are two different things. It's important to study the brain first and then we can dive deep into the subconscious mind. Subconscious beliefs

are there because of memory which creates imagination. And those are stimulated by stimuli. Okay? A stimulus is, you know, like something you're listening to right now, an audio podcast or if you're watching this on video, that's a stimulus. It's coming through your eyes, your ears.

your mouth, your nose, as from one of these senses. We sense a stimulus and it comes typically through, you know, audio waves and through, you know, visual waves into our eyes and our ears, which change this energy into electromagnetic pulses that get sent to different areas of our brain. So the audio, you know, waves that come in.

Dr. Travis Parry (16:44.802)
We'll go to the audio compartment in our brain. Like that's how it works. He's like, Hey, we're going to store this here. you've seen something great. We're going to store this here. You smell something great. We're going to store this here. Now, what most people think is they think it like when you store something in your brain, that it's like in some kind of order alphabetically or in some kind of like chronological order. It does none of that. In fact, I like to use this test. It's a brain mapping test.

basically I just say, think of like, here's a color, the color red, what do you think of them? People might say, oh, fire engine. And then we go, okay, red fire engine. What do you think of them? go, um, you know, a hospital, hospital. What do you think of, uh, grandma? Oh, grandma, funeral, funeral, um, friends, um, friends, um, dessert, dessert, um, uh, you know, uh, chewies, chewies, uh, tacos, like, and all of a sudden they've gone from red to tacos. Like it.

Because the way that our brain recalls that information, the way that it's stored is actually more like a spider web and like a mismatched spider web. Like it's kind of going all these different directions because of how it is placed into our brain. So we've got all these pathways and as we recall them, you know, these memories are there and they're stored in different areas. So if we have a stimulus, like we smell grandma's.

famous apple pie. It's Thanksgiving. Oh man, I can smell it now. Right? Oh, what goes with that pie? Oh, she's going to pull out that pure vanilla ice cream and we're going to devour that together. Woo. Can't wait. Right. Um, but then you start to have that memory, that nostalgia of that memory. And what else do you think about? Well, you might

Think about where you are at grandma's house. Yeah, Thanksgiving time, where you're at the little table, you're at the big table. Who is there? Your cousins, were there friends, were there aunts and uncles? Like your mind starts to go back there and recreate and even imagine that memory, okay? Now sometimes we can't recall it as good as we'd like. Maybe there's some issues from when we put the memory in there, but the memory's there and it's usually related to other memories. In fact, the best way to remember something

Dr. Travis Parry (19:09.878)
is to have as many senses touch it as possible, like touch, taste, smell, everything, like everything that you can use. And I'll throw in a sixth one, the sixth sense is a spiritual sense. We can debate on that, but I'm going to stick with this. I really do believe that we have a sixth sense, all of us do. And it's a spiritual connection that cannot be, you know, a lot of times behaviorally deduced, but it's spiritual. It's there.

And those that have a spiritual experience sometimes will involve other emotions. So what happens is you have this, the stimuli come into your brain or a stimulus, it transfer that energy to your brain. And what it does is when it gets there, it starts to recall other memories with it. And so it brings this flood of memories to your brain, sometimes up to 25,000 memories at a time when it's

really, really strong. Okay. And what does that do? Well, that then causes the brain to release chemicals into your body. Why? Because you're imagining being at grandma's house. You're imagining the apple pie. You're imagining the ice cream. You're imagining other things. And the brain starts to release hormones, chemicals into your body that help you experience that. It is fascinating, but we do this all the time.

at Christmas time, New Year's, like birthdays, whatever, things that are really important to us. Like it's easy to do that. Now, sometimes it's hard to recall memories because we've put it away so long ago and we haven't recalled it in a long time. So the memory is sort of not necessarily forgotten, but it's really hard to recall. But things like this are reoccurring traditions you have in your family, et cetera. They're often easier and that's why I bring them up. Well, emotions come.

because of what we put into our brain. Period. End of story. Exclamation point. They do not just happen on our own. Okay. For example, if you see someone, let's say, you know, as a dad, do you see your kid in harm's way? You know, they're running down the driveway. They're about to chase a ball out into the street. my gosh. I've told them a million times, do not run into the street. You could get ran over by a car. Right.

Dr. Travis Parry (21:38.508)
Well, it's likely that your reaction to that is fear, anxiety, maybe even anger at the driver, anger at the kid for not listening to whatever it is at the moment. Okay. Why you're experiencing those emotions, because you're taking in what you're seeing or hearing. It's going to the brain and the brain is in triggering these responses. The emotions that you feel come from your thoughts.

comes from your brain. So in level two, the thing that we need to really understand is if we're going to control our psychology, we're gonna recreate these things that are stopping us, keeping us from getting to that next level from being congruent and aligned with our conscious desires is we have to master our emotions.

Again, these emotions, some people will say it's energy in motion, emotion, it's energy. It's, you know, thought that turns, you know, from this electromagnetic energy into, um, again, the chemicals that release into our body. Those of you that work out like I do every day, the, uh, you know, as I work out as hard, you know, I'm lifting weights or I'm riding my mountain bike or doing something active and it can be difficult, but what the body does.

because it wants you to survive, it actually takes that in and says, hey, I'm gonna release some endorphins, are, you know, hormones, chemicals in your body, and it helps say, hey, this was a good thing for you to do. And that starts to create a memory in your mind that when I exercise, I feel good. Okay? So the important part here is if you want to master emotions, you have to master what you bring in. If you're watching,

things that creating fear and anxiety, you're likely to have those types of fears or anxieties because of sleep induced memory dreams, right? Or, you you tend to see it more. Those who are really concerned about the news and they're watching social media every minute of the day because of what's going on in the Middle East or whatever, they're likely to, you know, being

Dr. Travis Parry (23:58.314)
feel vulnerable or to feel fear. Like the research shows this. What we're bringing into our body through the eyes, the ears, the music, the podcasts we're listening to, Books or whatever. It's influencing our thought processes. Now, I know we could do the same thing for what you eat, what comes into your body, what you drink, what it is that you even say like,

Christ even mentions it's more important like what you say than what you eat or drink. So it can come in or out, right? But you know, how, what you smell, those senses, right? They recall memory, all of these things. So what I ask, you know, a lot of my clients to do is they, Hey, take a really good peek at level two. Really understand where you might be strong.

and where you might be weak. Okay? If you're watching pornography every day, your mind is gonna be mush. Like we can actually look at research that shows that the brain on pornography is very difficult to function properly. It's very difficult. It really kind of gets turned to mush. If you're sniffing drugs, you are smoking or drinking alcohol or you're listening to

horrible degrading music. Like all of those things, just some examples. I don't know what you're dealing with, but if you're dealing with things that are coming into your brain that are negative, that are complaining even, that are toxic or abusive, it will affect how your emotions play out. All right? Let me go really, really deep here. I really just want you to think about and examine.

What is it you're bringing into your, not just your body, but to your mind? Cause it's going straight to your mind first. It's calibrating. So a lot of people want to like, Hey, let me get past my fears. Let me get past my limiting beliefs and blocks. And you know, I just want to get to the really, really deep stuff. And they bypass this level too, where they don't really understand the brain body connection with emotions. The brain is controlling the emotions that you feel by what you bring in to your body.

Dr. Travis Parry (26:26.05)
your stimulus from these various stimuli. All right. Now level three is quite a bit deeper in level three. We actually look at the subconscious belief systems themselves. Here's the beauty and here's the hope. If you have a subconscious belief, for example, that you can not give a, give a speech, you cannot stand on stage. You are so scared. In fact,

I'm gonna bring this up is this is the number one fear of anyone. Actually, this is shown on so many different scales that people fear public speaking more than they do death itself. They'd rather die, right? I'm not saying that. That's just how it's interpreted. But the pain, the anxiety, the stress level is so high. So I just want to use this. If you fear public speaking,

It's likely because you had a bad experience or you've been told that you're bad at speaking or acting or you'll never be something. There's a lot of these subconscious belief systems. Now, most of us, these subconscious beliefs are really rooted in fears and fears can be unlearned and it can be reprogrammed.

Enter Tony Robbins and NLP. Okay. So I want to talk about this a little bit. NLP, subconscious belief systems, clearing mechanisms have been around since coaching really began. Like when really when it took off and like the, in the nineties, right? Sometimes even late eighties, et cetera. I worked with Jim Rohn and Joe Vitale. I met Joe and John Asterov and a lot of these other big players in the movie, the secret.

And, know, when I was coaching and talking to these individuals about their subconscious belief systems, we'd have to really identify where these belief systems came from. What triggered this? What, what actually was like the first wrinkle? And for most men, I find it comes from two different places. It comes from, a lot of times dad at a very early age or sports.

Dr. Travis Parry (28:51.18)
So male figures typically, sports typically, a coach for these young men, they remember these limiting thoughts and beliefs when they were young teenagers. Sometimes, you know, really early in their, you know, they're growing up maybe eight, nine, 10, but typically early teenagers, right? And I find that fascinating because they're trying to achieve a goal.

Maybe they're trying to get better at baseball and the coach says you'll never be good. That's how it was for me. Actually. I was, I was not great at baseball. My dad was fantastic. I couldn't figure out what I was doing. My coach never took the time to say, Travis, you're dropping your right shoulder and you're swinging like an all star trying to be in the big leagues and you're missing every ball because your, your swing is going high. he never did that. Never.

I came to every practice. did everything that I was asked to do, but he never took me aside and said, Hey, and I think I was 11. Um, and he wouldn't play me, uh, cause I would strike out all the time. So I'd sit the bench. My dad was like, Hey, we're gonna, we're gonna get you better. And he, he put a bunch of cinder blocks up and, and a, pop can on top of the cinder blocks about the, my, my, uh, you know, arm, my shoulder level. And he had me swing.

with a metal bat to hit this pop can off the top of these cinder blocks. Now what happens when you hit the cinder blocks? Yikes. You know, like it stings. I can honestly, I just thinking about talking about memory and recall. I can still remember how that zing feels to hit the cinder block. Even just barely. He was trying to teach me to swing level and it worked. My next at bats. I was so much better cause I retrained myself.

The brain works like this. And when we talk about muscle memory, it's actually not muscle memory. It's brain memory. That's where memory sits. It doesn't sit in your brain, in your muscle cells. Memory is here. So when we talk about, you know, uh, muscle memory, it's because what you've done with your muscles allows you to, you know, recall this. So what does this have to do with public speaking? Well, it's the number one fear.

Dr. Travis Parry (31:11.63)
And likely you developed a fear for it subconsciously somehow in the past, maybe as early as, you know, eight, nine, 10. Again, a lot of times it's come from sports and I, I overcame this. was so good. And that's the hope. The hope is I want to tell you is like, if you have a subconscious fear of belief, great, welcome to the club, but you can overcome it by reprogramming. So NLP comes in as, um, a player in coaching.

by really helping you understand that you can rewire the pathways in your brain. Some people say, yeah, we're hardwired, we come like this. It's just not true. It's not true. Male and female brains are different and so there is some programming there that is maybe hardwired, but you know, it is a metaphor. So I think sometimes you think, we can't change, our brains can't change. That's not true at all. We absolutely can.

human developmental psychologists will tell you that every single day. And in my doctorate degree, we learned all about the various theories in human development. And for those that don't develop certain ways, you actually can go back in therapy and fix them, which is what we'll talk about in level four. All right? So in this level three, the idea is to identify where are these subconscious beliefs coming from that are keeping you from

getting to this next level. So if you want to 10x your business or you want to speak on stage or you want to lose 10 pounds, whatever that is, it's likely if you've tried at a conscious level to do something over and over and over again and it does not work, it's just not coming to you, likely have something stuck in either the emotional side or the stimulus side, right? This level two or in a level three where you are actually telling yourself

What somebody has told you probably 30 years ago that is so powerful that every time you think about going up, I'm going to go be a public speaker, I'm going to stand on stage. No, you'll never be good at baseball. Right? So that in turn becomes you'll never be good at anything. Right? That subconscious fear will keep you from speaking at all. And you'll never stand on stage. I've seen people, unfortunately, I've never had that problem.

Dr. Travis Parry (33:37.23)
But I've seen people who get on stage and they just shake uncontrollably and they can't speak. just tongue is tied. Get them off stage and talk to them in a seat or something and I can talk to them for hours but get them in front of 500 people and they freak out. There's a subconscious belief. So the great thing is you can reprogram this and this is where neuro-linguistic programming actually got its start is like, well, we examine the brain. We know the things light up, where they light up, when you do certain

you know, aspects of working with the brain. And so we can reprogram it by teaching our brain certain subconscious techniques. Now, I use the serenity pattern in my coaching. I talk about the things you can control, which you can't control and focus on coping with this stress at a level three by subconsciously trying to get in the habit of knowing what it is you can control, okay? What you can't control. If you can't...

do that, then I, you if you can't either have the courage to do the things you're supposed to do or let go of things you're just holding on to forever. Okay, the one play that you messed up in the championship game. Or, you know, tripping and falling on the way up to your very first speech in junior high when you were running for an office and you lost. Okay?

those things, if you can't let go of those, or if you can't have the courage to even just step on the stage, then I know it's likely because you have subconscious beliefs. So I get in and we go deep into examining, is this a limiting belief? Like, I will never be good at anything, right? What are the consequences of having that thought come through your mind? What triggers that thought? Is that thought worth keeping? Does it help and serve you?

If it doesn't, then what's an opposite statement that you can say to help reprogram these neuro-linguistic programming efforts is really just reprogramming to start whenever you have a situation that you're in and you start to say the same thought that's negative, that's subconsciously blocking, that you can recognize it, stop it, and say the new thing.

Dr. Travis Parry (36:01.238)
and help to reprogram so that instead of the thought of, you know, speaking on stage, somebody asks you to come up and speak for their group, whatever, instead of you going, no, I'm not good at anything, I can't do speaking, sorry, I'm not gonna do it, you change that to, I know what I'm talking about, I'm a great speaker. Boom, you start telling yourself that. And subconsciously, over time, your brain starts to think that. So whenever,

You know, you have a thought of speaking, you tell yourself, I'm a great speaker, boom, you create a new pathway in the brain that becomes subconscious. When we think subconscious, well, it just becomes second nature. It becomes a, don't even have to cognitively think about it, right? 5 % of your day is analytical, it's cognitively focused on, you know, exactly where you're at in the present, et cetera. But 95 % of time, you're kind of in a...

Trans state, a subconscious state where just, you know, we're acting on reflexes and programs from when we were a kid, like came to this existence. This is where most coaching happens. It happens in the second level of the, of really the subconscious state. And, you know, we tend to forget the level one.

the conscious values and level two, the emotions. We tend to kind of jump to this level three, because if we can get past these limiting beliefs, like Tony Robbins says, great, well now we can implement these systems in our business, these things that can help us to grow and scale and become more authoritative, et cetera, et cetera, et cetera. Well, that would be really nice if all this worked 100%. In the last...

20 years of my career, I've learned about the conscious and the subconscious, emotions and the brain and now the mind and subconscious limiting thoughts and beliefs and I've coached and trained and taught classes and spoken on stage about all these. I've tried it on myself and quite honestly, I had something that has been just kicking my trash for years and I could not get past it. I tried all these things that I've been teaching others.

Dr. Travis Parry (38:24.984)
I've also noticed that when I can get my clients into level two, excuse me, level three, level three, that they make some great progress initially, but it seems like they kind of come back and revert back over a period of time. So I wrote this book, Marry and Grow Rich, how to develop together, couple development. Well, hey, you need an accountability person that can help you. And it doesn't have to be your mentor or coach, right? We can teach you these things, but...

We don't want to mentor and coach you through these limiting blocks and beliefs your entire life. That it's very debilitating. It kind of goes beyond what we are designed to do as coaches. So, and quite honestly, therapists. Therapists will put you on the spot too, if you're listening. You do some great work, but sometimes you debilitate clients by having them, you know, focus on your helping them.

their, your entire, their entire life. You know, this kind of been common now, like, well, I've gone going to therapy for 10 years or I have this coach for five years, whatever. Yeah, that might be helpful, but typically we're trying to help people to get off on their own. When I was coaching for Joe Vitali's team and John Asteroff and Stephen Covey and Jim Rohn, and for all these big, you know, thought leaders, I found that the ones that were doing really well were the ones who had

great accountability partner who was their spouse, right? So I do believe that, hey, if you can involve your spouse at this level one, two, and three, like you guys can grow and develop together. That's the whole point of couple development. Well.

That still is going to give a level of improvement. Sometimes is not transformative. Sometimes we need to go a step deeper. For example, this issue I've been dealing with, I involve my wife, like we work together at it. We were really trying to get on the same page. We're trying to move forward with momentum. this could be a health challenge, which it was for me, it's a health challenge.

Dr. Travis Parry (40:31.31)
It could be financial challenge, which my wife and I have had lots of those and we work through those and trying to help each other get on the same page and that's what really what marrying girl which is all about that the whole idea of getting on the same page financially But it could be parenting it could could be anything that's in your family could be business-wise Well, it's always better to have the supportive spouse. You will go so much further in life

period end of story and I will hang my hat on that and I call it the balanced growth method. So you've got the make time method, your time management and goals. You've got scaling and growing with your spouse. That's wonderful. But what if there's just that one thing? It just keeps coming back up. You just can't do it. You just can't scale. You can't grow. You're not able to do it together. So recently I jumped in and decided to check out a level four intervention.

Now, I'm not going to name it, but I'm going tell you what it does. And I'm going to help you understand this at a basic level because that's about where I'm at. I went through this level four intervention and I understood why level one, two and three have a certain level of effectiveness and why it doesn't fix the subconscious completely. And I'll explain it like this.

If you're just consciously trying to fix the subconscious, again, you're only there 5 % of the time. The subconscious is working 95 % of the time there in the background and, you're there most of the time throughout your day is likely that the subconscious is going to overpower your conscious without a doubt. Okay. Even if you, know, on the level two, working on your emotions and trying to get rid of the stressors and other things, it'll open your mind and it'll help for a time. You'll see some change.

But as you get into the level three and you try to get past those subconscious beliefs that are stuck there, you're likely just kind of peeling off layers of an onion and you get to more and deeper subconscious belief systems that have been stuck there for again, 20, 30, 40 years at some points. Okay. And so if you're there, you might, you might be there for a very long time. And I find that a lot of people, they bail on it. They get to this level three and they get some progress and like, Oh, I think this is it. And they bail and they stop.

Dr. Travis Parry (42:53.352)
improving. They stop because it gets too hard or they've hit another issue that they just can't get past subconsciously. In addition, if you're trying to change your subconscious with your subconscious, you have two big problems. One is yes, a fear, subconscious belief can be rewritten by a belief system, but it takes time.

You have to, every time you're faced with that thought or activating event, you're like, goodness. somebody asked me to give a speech, you know, and if, and if the initial reaction is, can't do anything right. Cause that's what my baseball coach told me. Then I'm going to say no to that. Right. But if, if you remember to say to yourself subconsciously over and over again, that, whenever I get an activating event, I'm going to say this out loud, which I hope.

reprogram my subconscious that I'm good at speaking and I can do this right whatever that is it takes time to reprogram and over time that thought process this neural you know pathway will get stronger and stronger and stronger but you you know in the subconscious we can't just go in and clip this old pathway it's still fair it's still there so you have to like really

work super hard at reprogramming. And I just thought, Hey, if I get the people to level three, myself included, and we can get past these no big deal. Well, if you've had an issue for 30, 40 years, which is where I find most of my clients at, they're fighting an old belief system that is super ingrained, super ingrained. What do you do? Do you just keep fighting it? Eventually.

even having an accountability person to help you through, you give up because it's so big. In addition, I told you there's two problems. That's the first problem is the old problem. You know, the old pathway is so strong and you can't just come in and clip it out at a subconscious level. Okay. I'll get to you in level four. There's, there's, there's positive at the end of this rainbow. Okay. Um, but the other thing that's keeping you there is the fact that you're older now.

Dr. Travis Parry (45:16.886)
And that subconscious belief happened when you were younger, when the brain was spongy, when you were susceptible to new improved ideas. Think about the youth, know, young adults, et cetera. They are much more likely to accept a new idea because their brain isn't fully formed and developed yet. So you're fighting not only a stronger belief, but now you're doing it with an older mind.

And it's very true that old is really hard to teach an old dog new tricks because of the way the brain has to record, you know, these memories and these neuro-linguistic or these neural pathways. Okay. So it would be nice if you could just say it one time and get rid of the old belief system. It would be nice. Enter level four, level four, again, the brain and the mind.

are separate things. We talked about the brain and how it stores information, right, and creates these emotions that are in level two. Well, level four is the super conscious. Now, most of us who've been in psychology, you may have heard of the super ego from Freud, et cetera. I'm going give you a little background, a little bit of history, really little. Freud was really given

You know, this, this, probably inappropriate title though of, of the father of psycho analysis. Psycho analysis was this, you know, idea that you could get into the mind and analyze what's been happening. most therapy comes from some psycho analysis therapy that has been altered and, and, and made better. I, Freud had a lot of things that were, you know, he became really famous, but,

I personally believe he was a pervert and his research methodologies don't actually stack up to a PhD level of research and a lot of his studies can't cannot be recreated. He decided to work with women in their forties and found or maybe pushed them into this idea that most of the issues that they had in their life were something psychosexual.

Dr. Travis Parry (47:40.716)
So I believe that Freud was a psycho sexual, not necessarily psycho and Nala, and, and, and, and, know, most of his ideas were psycho sexual and not necessarily psychoanalysis. And so there, there, there were stories and tales of, of his inappropriate behavior with his clients. and a lot of these women were in relationships that they didn't necessarily feel, you know, they were having a great.

sexual relationship with their partners. So he may have taken advantage of them. I don't know. Like, I don't know the personal, but I've read enough research on him to know that he was super focused, hyper-focused on this idea. And so I believe his psycho sexual that said, you know, in, in, my PhD level experience, with, analyzing various theories, found Freud to be very flawed, but what I did not know is where he picked up a lot of his ideas.

I don't want to go too geek out on this for everybody. just want to give you just one other layer. There's a guy named a Mesmer, Alan Mesmer, I believe Mesmer, um, was experimenting with, um, energy and with, um, mag magnetic abilities of, of, of himself and with other clients. And he actually was seeing a lot of people getting healed.

by this idea of using magnets and by using eye movement. And eventually, you know, there were several, but this, this one stands out. Mesmer. We get the, we get the phrase mesmerizing from Mesmer because he would hypnotize his clients. Now, I don't know if he really realized this and, and some may differ with this idea, but

Reality is that he would put them into a trance like state which is where we get the modern idea of of Hypnosis now most of us really hypnosis man, like we're giving our will to somebody else to put us into some kind of trance They're gonna take away our ability to choose and that's against my freedom and my spirit and rejects it blah blah blah That's where I was 20 years ago, and I've written up

Dr. Travis Parry (50:02.526)
written off hypnosis as just like a, a stage comedian act. And quite honestly, it's not Mesmer's fault. There were others who took his ability to put people into trance and heal them of not just, mental, but physical, ailments. And they took it to the stage for the reason of trying to gain

notoriety and appreciation for this new form of medical healing. It wasn't mental. It wasn't at all. It was medical. People were being healed of all sorts of things. And sometimes it's kind of crazy, but Mesmer would just have to touch a tree and people will come touch the tree and they would be healed of these various ailments. and he would blame it on, on magnetism and magnetic abilities. And eventually people who studied him realized, no, actually it has more to do.

with this hypnosis, putting people into trance. Well, long story, those who went on to stage there, you know, their initial idea was to help the masses was to help crowds was to help others. And so they'd bring people up on stage and then hypnotize them and people would fake it. People would be in a different state because they're worried about what other people were thinking about them. And it didn't work. actually what it did to hipnotherapy, cause you and I probably have the same like

What? This is weird. Like that's something you you do in a cruise ship or, know, at a party at Christmas or something and a comedian comes, how can this be healing? Well, that's where it started. World war one and world war two, hypnotherapy. You can go back and do the research on this. Hypnotherapy after world war one and world war two were over. Hypnotherapists were very, very high.

you know, they're active, they were highly sought after by the military to help treat those with what they used to call shell shock. Right? Well, we know today as PTSD. All right. Why? Because they could put them into trance and help them deal with these fears, these anxieties that they have. But our society, the way that it is because it's since essentializes sensationalizes everything.

Dr. Travis Parry (52:24.238)
As we've kind of as a mainstream thought, hip, you know, hypnosis is bad. It's weird. It takes away your agency. The reality is the myths. There's a lot of them. won't going to get all of them, but the reality is someone in order to be put into a trance and a hip hypnotic state, they actually need to have control of their mind. The ones that are really, um, intelligent to the ones who can focus really well, they're the ones who actually do better in hypnosis.

And let me connect the dots. Why am I talking about Freud and Mesmer? Freud actually saw how effective hypnosis was because of Mesmer and others. And he said, I want to do that, but I want to make more money with it. And you know, again, was psychosexual. So he kind of, he found like, I believe a perverted thing to do.

And focused on sometimes, you know, again, married women and had sexual relationships with them. but he took mesmers, hypnosis and said, Hey, when you do hypnosis, all you're really doing is talking to them. And so I'm just going to use talk therapy. I'm not going to put them in trance. I'm going to talk to them and I'm going to stretch this out. So instead of being one or two or three sessions and being very efficient with this type of therapy,

We're going to make this last six months and we're going to charge them. The other thing that Freud is he, his ideal client was very wealthy. Again, like there's some capitalistic things we can look at, like, Hey, you know, find your ideal client and serve them and, charge them what you're worth, et cetera, et cetera. But I think also he preyed upon these women who were vulnerable. And as I mentioned, he was more of a cycle sexual focus and then psychoanalysis. from Freud though, we get Eric Erickson.

And Eric Erickson, as you, if you've read my book, achieving balance, talk about, has developmental, steps of from child till death that really helps us understand how we can have values to begin with. So I start with Eric Erickson, but he took Freud stuff and made it better. So if I, I find this in the world of psychology, this is, this is what scientists do. All right.

Dr. Travis Parry (54:46.006)
They throw a theory out there, they try it, they find some evidence of it working or not, and then others go back and they try that and they improve upon, improve upon, improve upon. So I get to level four now. I have had my own experience with, with this hip, hip, hypnotherapy. And I don't like to say hypnosis because we tend to think of the comedian acts on stage, but hypnotherapy as a legitimate therapy. way that I look at it, it's the OG.

of all these other therapies, including NLP. Milton Erickson was a hypnotherapist and one of those who were studied when he was doing hypnosis and hypnotherapy with his clients, other researchers came in and like, Hey, what is Milton doing? How is he talking? What's he doing? All these things. And that's how they came up with NLP. NLP was a non-trans inducing shortcut to hypnotherapy.

And this is why it can be very effective. But if we go back to this idea of level three, if we're just using the subconscious to help the subconscious, we are fighting a very long uphill battle most people give up, even if they have accountability partners. So getting into hypnotherapy actually brings us into what some call the super conscious. Now,

If consciousness is 5 % of our time, know this analytical cognitive, you know, very focused on the present type of thinking subconscious is trance like it's You know, we're daydreaming happens where You know, we're just reacting with emotions, etc. This is where we are 95 % of the day. Okay. Well, then what's the super conscious? Super conscious is flow state

Super conscious is where you're at when you are listening to the most amazing music. had an experience earlier this year. I was on a cruise ship and I was listening to some of the most amazing music I've ever heard. And in that state, I just closed my eyes. If you're watching me now, I just closed my eyes. was relaxing. was listening for an hour. I did not open my eyes. I did not fall asleep.

Dr. Travis Parry (57:14.414)
wasn't snoring, my body didn't go to sleep state, which can be in theta or delta wave patterns, but I actually was awake, I was there, but I was in this flow state where because of that I actually fixed an issue and that I was trying to work on a different book that I...

As soon as I was done, my wife and I went to our cabins and I wrote, we wrote for about an hour and a half. She wrote a bunch of her feelings. She went into flow state on some things that were really troubling her. And I wrote out a book. It's, right here. It's in my hand. It's, it's in this folder right here. And I have six pages of notes. I was really trying to simplify, you know, a message. I wish I could simplify this message of one, two, three, and four, but,

as I'm trying to teach you right now, but I spent all this time, an hour and a half, and I just wrote and wrote and wrote and wrote, and it came to me so fast. Why? Because I went into super conscious. This is the difference between mind and brain. Brain has different cortexes, or basically compartments of where your memories are stored and utilized, et cetera, but your mind has the conscious, subconscious, and super conscious.

Some people will say that super conscious is a spiritual part of the mind. Well, how do we know that the mind and the brain are different? People ask me all, you know, this question all the time, like, listen, if your brain, you know, the brain transplants actually exist, right? Like people can do that. But if your brain is taken out and, and, uh, you know, uh, they put a machine to function while your brain is out and they're fixing it or whatever, like not even transplant, but just, know,

doing brain surgery, whatever, and they shut it down. You can actually be brain dead, but still alive. People have come back from being brain dead. Like you read about it. There's lots of research on this of people coming back from, you know, near death experiences, et cetera. I'm not even talking about out of body. I'm just talking about near death. And, and so we know that the mind exists separate from the organ of the brain.

Dr. Travis Parry (59:40.768)
And this super conscious is most powerful. We talk to Olympic athletes. and you think about these Olympic athletes that, they row.

They row and they've got to be in sync.

Dr. Travis Parry (59:58.95)
And in order to be in sync, they get into this flow state where the entire team is just moving exactly at the same synchronous pace. That's what it's like. And you know, you've been there before. And if you've been there before, you know what it feels like to feel like something you do is effortless. It's effortless. And some people, well, that's just a gift.

That's just God granting me something and maybe it is. I'm not going to argue with you, but you're in your super conscious. Okay. When I was there on the cruise ship with my eyes closed, listening to this incredibly beautiful music by Jenny Oakes Baker, by the way, if you know her, she's incredible. Absolutely incredible. Go to her concerts, listen to her music. It will put you into a flow state. If my kids have a trouble sleeping, I will turn on Jenny Oakes Baker at night.

After I've done my routines and they'll go to sleep so beautiful anyway You can self induce flow state a lot of times music music therapy is incredible Because what you can do when you get into flow state is your super conscious can go into your subconscious and fix the issues that you're struggling with subconsciously it is though

the sub or the super conscious does come in and snips the old limiting beliefs that are stuck there. The ones that you've been trying, like I'm going to, I'm going to try subconsciously to get past my limiting blocks and belief systems by rerouting these neuro pathways and building up this strong super connection that was somehow eventually going to be stronger than this old one that's 30, 40 years old. Right? Again, that is

very difficult, even with an accountability partner, even with coaching. But when you can get into super conscious, it doesn't take very long at all. It doesn't take very long at all. Hypnotherapy can induce this flow-like state. It can get you into super conscious. It's not dangerous. It's not giving up your will. In fact,

Dr. Travis Parry (01:02:20.062)
It is you figuring out the problem. What I find fascinating is a lot of therapy, know, talk therapy for think of, think of like smoking sensation or pornography addiction or anxiety, depression, all, all of these, you know, major issues that we have in society that people are trying to rid themselves of. Like they could go to a traditional talk therapist and they could be meeting with them for years and never see improvement.

But just on this one issue of let's just say pornography, hypnotherapy is 95 % effective. 95. You can compare that to some therapies out there and it's less than 13%. Even when you involve cognitive and behavior, the mind and the behaviors together, which I used to think, hey, this is everything, like you're putting them together, you're not working alone, it's action and thought.

But yeah, it's because most of the time we're trying to use that conscious thought, maybe even the top level of, you know, level two of the subconscious to get in there. If we get into level three, man, we're working really hard, but we burn out. We get worked out. We get overworked on this level. And even with an accountability partner, fail. So hypnotherapy, we can be put into trance and in that trance state, man, we're there like 95 % of the day. We're already there.

We're already into a trance-like state, but that superconscious can be implored to help you fix what's going on in the subconscious. And that's what happens with hypnotherapy. Now, I am teaching more about this in a mastermind than I'm doing if you're listening to this before. Well, I'll probably run this back. So I'm just going to throw this out here.

I do some more in depth. I'm going to answer questions and do a master class on this. can go to balancegrowthinc.com forward slash master the mind. So balancegrowthinc.com forward slash master the mind or just go to balancegrowthinc.com and you'll likely see a link to that when we're running that. I will likely be shifting my direction on family legacy planning and I'm going be writing this book first.

Dr. Travis Parry (01:04:43.246)
I'll be writing this book about how to get into this level four state and be able to get yourself on stage, scale your business without the stress. Um, because most of the time, 80 % as Tony Robbins says, it's in our psychology. It's in our brain. All right. So then what do we do? Where do we start? Well, start at level one, figure out your values and really know who you are. It's very Eric Erickson.

figure out what your identity is. We should have figured this out between 14 and 16-ish. And most people who haven't ever figured that out really struggle with their marriage, with children, with their later life as grandparents, and they really have a lot of regret. Okay, so I highly recommend that. Two, acknowledge what are you bringing into your mind through the various stimuli, touch, taste, smell.

Vision auditory and then your spiritual sense. Are you feeding your brain and your body? Through this the stimuli in a healthy productive way if there's things you need to kick out of The diet for the brain kick it out. There are things you need to put in there put them in Replace I love replacement therapy. It is very behavioral though, right? So replace and hopefully you never go back Okay, replace that if you're used to watching, you know dumb

Netflix shows that are just shoot them up and or you're playing video games or watching pornography like improve your life by replacing with something else and You got to get into that starting to control these emotions level three again. It's really identifying What is the subconscious belief system that you're really struggling with? How do you get free of these subconscious systems? Well get started try to get those neural pathways in a different direction

I don't think you have to jump straight to level four. I think you can start level one, level two, level three. And the reason being is you want to try. Now, the reason why you want to try is because you really want to see how hard it is. And you want to know that, if we can fix it in level one, great. Fantastic. If you can fix it in level two, more power to you. We don't have to go to a level four, but most people

Dr. Travis Parry (01:07:00.864)
If it's something persisting and they're not 10x in their business, they're not able to get on stage and become a thought leader. It's because they've got these stuck subconscious beliefs that have been around for years and years and years and years. So we do need to get to a level four, but level one, two, and three will prep you for our discussion level four. It'll get the muddy water, you know, kind of stirred up. So we know what rises to the top and what issues we really need to dig into.

Now, if you're like right now, I really need to make some change. I want to step on stage. I want to be a thought leader. I want to write a book. I want to grow my business with thought leadership. want to, you know, 10 X my company, grow my sales department, marketing, whatever it is. Again, there's, know, I'd say, Hey, get my time management book, achieving balance, you know, go out there and be more productive. get on the same page with your spouse and grow your business together by getting off the field. talk all about it. My second book, Mary and grow rich.

And I've got another book coming out about family legacy someday. Like it'll, it'll get there, but until we actually truly get in to this level for understanding, get past our subconscious beliefs, like Tony Robbins says, we won't ever put that 20 % of those skills that we've developed in any part of our business to use because their psychology is in the way. You want to be a high performer.

You want to grow rich? You want to 10x your business without stress? You want to get the balance that you want in your life back? Then reach out to me. Send me an email at Travis at balancedgrowthinc.com or Travis at travisperry with an a.com. Send me an email. Go to my website. Either one of those websites, travisperry.com, balancedgrowthinc.com and sign up for my free courses, grab my books, et cetera. I don't have this book out yet.

But I've completely changed my business model to really tackling these issues, getting you into a level four. If you're ready for hypnotherapy, we'll figure it out. We'll do a consultation, free consultation to help you understand where you're at. And maybe you just need to get to level one or two deeper or three. But likely as I've experienced in my life, getting into that level four has completely changed it for me. It has completely rearranged how

Dr. Travis Parry (01:09:23.938)
I am able to think I am lighter. I am happier. My wife last few months like you were so much happier. Even if there's stressful things going on, it is nothing compared to what it used to be. My mental health is so much clearer, so much better. And this is from somebody who's tried level one, two and three has been teaching us for the last 20 years, helping clients getting past this myself has given me a whole new level.

and I'm leveling up. And if you want to come with me, I'm going to teach you. And I'm happy to help you in this level four using hypnotherapy. And maybe I'll give you one last thing to think on. Again, we can do this over Zoom. It doesn't have to be in my office. We'll get you down to level four so that you can finally get past these things. I've had a client who struggles with confidence, a client who has major fear of failure.

a client that is, you know, just unable to let go of things and using this modality, this level four, hypnotherapy has really improved their life. And we'll be able to cut out those old habits, not just retrain, but just cut out the other old ones completely. Because you, once you get into this hypnotic trance, this super

conscious flow of thought, you're able to solve your own problems. The therapist, I am not here to tell you what to do. I don't diagnose anything. You actually are able, finally, to tell your subconscious what to do. And so then you are able to reprogram it from the super conscious. It is the only long term way. It is the OG of all other therapies.

It works more effectively than anything else. Even emotion coding, foot zoning, NLP, meditation and prayer. Like all those things are good. You want the Lord's help. You want to meditate. You want to be able to understand your emotions and clear those out and X, et cetera, et cetera, et cetera. But what works most effectively is getting to this level for hip hypnotic trance to be able to get past your subconscious beliefs once and for all.

Dr. Travis Parry (01:11:49.198)
All right. Now this is a long podcast. And if, if again, if you want help on this, I might be doing some more masterminds on this soon. Come and find us there. balancegrowthinc.com/themastermind. If you want help right now, you know, email me Travis at balancegrowthinc.com or travis@travisparry.com, and we will talk to you soon until next time. Remember live life on purpose together.

​